I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
