he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
