my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I just found a bag of teeth...
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
Randomize
