we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
my liver is dry heaving
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
