Already got asked if we're dating
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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