I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Randomize
