I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
