i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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