He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
fuck your aforementioned shoe
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize