dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
