what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
She has the best kind of daddy issues
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
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