BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
