Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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