i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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