Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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