Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Randomize
