The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I have got to stop telling people I was almost a prositute every time I drink
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
