I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Even my vagina gasped.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
