where am i from again
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Randomize
