My brain says no but my pants say off.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Randomize
