i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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