ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
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