Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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