You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
