3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
