We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize