You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
