We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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