3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
