he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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