DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
There are leaves in my underwear?
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Shame - the story of my life.
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