This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Randomize
