I understand Curling. That high.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
