I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
