just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize