i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
