oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Never underestimate the power of titties
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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