i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
We named our party play list daddy issues
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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