ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
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