I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
