the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
