i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
Randomize
