I wish I could punch you in the face.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
He kissed a someone with a penis
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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