i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
