I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Randomize
