I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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