So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
