There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Randomize
