Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
His nipple licking is glorious
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