I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
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