Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Just Everbombed a Guiness to make up for cutting out early last night. Also the Mars probe. Happy birthday motherfucker!
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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