we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Randomize
